You Can’t Make This Stuff Up – February 2017

preparation of a roasted chicken

Shoplifter attempts to steal a raw chicken down his pants

This is the bizarre moment a bungling thief pulled a whole chicken out of his trousers after he was caught stealing food. The man, who has not been identified, was pulled into an office by security guards at a supermarket after workers suspected him of stealing food. The incident happened in the Russian city of St Petersburg and employee filmed the footage, and it has since gone viral after being posted online. 

In the footage the man can be seen struggling to get the stolen goods out of his trousers. He desperately tries to pull the meat out of his pants, much to the shock of the guards.  The man is then forced to unzip his jacket and loosen his trousers and only then is he able to pull the whole chicken out by its legs in the bizarre scenes.  It is reported that once the chicken was free, a bunch of sausages then fell out onto the floor too. It is not known if police were called or if charges are being pressed. The thief has not been identified.  [Source: Daily Mail – UK]

Former mint worker who hid stolen gold in rectum sentenced

A former Royal Canadian Mint employee who stole 22 cookie-sized pieces of refined gold by hiding them in his rectum has been sentenced to 30 months in prison. Thirty-five-year-old Leston Lawrence was found guilty last November of stealing the pieces from the mint and selling 17 of them through Ottawa Gold Buyers.  Ontario Court judge Peter Doody on Thursday sentenced Lawrence and ordered him to pay a fine of US$145,900. Doody says the stolen gold was worth US$127,116.11. Court testimony indicated that Lawrence was involved in purifying recently procured gold and sometimes worked alone, out of sight of security cameras.  [Source: Yakima – Herald]

Shoplifter made baby out of toy dog and bra to fool staff

Saffron Curtiss-McGinty hatched a plan to stash stolen goods under a child’s buggy but the problem was she didn’t have a baby. But the 18-year-old overcame the dilemma by making a child from a cuddly toy dog – dressed in a baby-grow and scratch mitts – and half a bra with facial features scrawled on the underwear.

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Suspicious staff at B&M Bargains stopped her on January 27 and found scented candles, sweets and an electric toothbrush hidden in the buggy. 
West Midlands Police officers attended at 1.30pm and arrested Curtiss-McGinty, from Conybere Road in Highgate, for theft and assault after hearing allegations she had slapped a store manager across the face.  She admitted two counts of shoplifting – having also been caught on CCTV stealing from the same store the previous day – and assault by beating.  [Source: Express & Star]

Shoplifting stripper drops goodies, ID in parking lot

A Florida woman who fled Kmart with more than $1,000 in stolen items was caught after she dropped three bags in the parking lot, including her purse containing her Social Security card and passport.  Her purse also had 11 used syringes, methamphetamine, cotton swabs, a cut straw and a metal spoon with burnt residue on it, according to her Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office arrest report.

Stolen items included jewelry, watches, a romance candle, acrylic nails, lipsticks and a black bag, which she filled with stolen items. When deputies went to her house, she was still wearing the same clothing captured on surveillance video, her report said. She said the used narcotics and paraphernalia were hers. She was charged with felony theft, resisting the recovery of property, removing devices intended to deter shoplifting and possession of drugs and paraphernalia. She works as an exotic dancer, according to her arrest report. The 30-year-old is due in court Feb. 8 for the incident.   [Source: NFW Daily News]

Convicted Peoria bank robber allegedly robs same bank eight years later

A Northwest Peoria man faces up to 45 years in prison for allegedly robbing a Commerce Bank branch last month at gunpoint. And it appears the branch that was held up also was robbed by the same man eight years ago. Tarius D. Ganaway, 28, was indicted Tuesday by a Peoria County grand jury on charges of armed robbery, aggravated robbery, financial institution robbery and possession of a weapon by a felon in connection with the Jan. 11, 2009 robbery. Police allege he went into the bank branch along with another man. The two were armed, took an undetermined amount of money and then fled. The other man, who has not yet been arrested, was allegedly armed with a shotgun.

Last Thursday, police, working with the U.S. Marshals Fugitive Task Force, located Ganaway in Rockford, where he was taken into custody on a parole violation. Prosecutors here issued a $150,000 arrest warrant in connection with the incident. A date for him to appear in court has not yet been scheduled as he is currently in the Department of Corrections on a parole violation in connection with a 2009 conviction where he was sentenced to 14 years for holding up two banks and attempting to rob a gas station.

In that earlier case, prosecutors said Ganaway was arrested about a month after the Feb. 13, 2009, robbery at the Downtown 66 gas station. Police said Ganaway had gone into the gas station and tried to hold it up but was accosted by someone in the business. A struggle ensued, and Ganaway managed to get away, according to Journal Star archives. In the struggle, however, he dropped a pellet gun and a cellphone.  Upon his arrest, he was questioned and admitted to the Jan. 3, 2009 robbery at National City Bank, and the Dec. 23, 2008, robbery of the same Commerce Bank branch. In both of those earlier incidents, he went into the banks and demanded money while implying he had a handgun. He later told police the weapon was a pellet gun. If convicted of the new charges, he faces up to 45 years in prison as prosecutors have alleged he used a handgun during the robbery.  [Source: Journal Star]

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